I’m changing. Why can’t they see it?

I often get this question. It comes from a place of hard work followed by disappointment. It comes from the unmet expectation that others will see the progress we are making as quickly, and clearly, as we do.Those who have embarked upon a development journey are aware of the significant effort required to move beyond deep-rooted tendencies into a new version of ourselves. It is incredibly rewarding to approach life situations with a new perspective keeping our reactive tendencies at bay. As we change, the importance of recognition and encouragement grows, and with it comes an expectation that others will see the change. But just because we saw something change in ourselves does not mean we should expect others to see it – at least not right away.

Leadership development takes time. It is a lifelong process. As you change and evolve, it takes time for people to experience you differently, to see the changes and adjust their pattern of working with you. 

You will make progress before others see it. They need to see a repeated pattern of adjusted behaviour before changing their perceptions and story about you. It could take months for a new tendency to consciously impact those around us. Don’t be discouraged. This is normal.

We are better off eliminating the need to perform for others, concentrating instead on our own human development journey. As our transformation endures we do receive positive feedback, but almost certainly not on the timeline we expect. 

This is also where an executive coach can support you. Your coach will co-create a development plan, hold you accountable and provide encouragement as you grow. To accelerate your own leadership journey contact us today.

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